No one in the history of Christmas (and most other occasions) has really known what to buy their dad. Or brother. Or cousin. Dad's already got a power drill. Brothers are uncommunicative about their tastes. And cousins? Well, who knows what's going on there.
Volume five's "Things I've Learnt" man is Sunday Times restaurant critic A.A. Gill, who kindly explains why journalists should start bar fights and the importance of sitting through dreadful school plays. Here are some words we couldn't fit in.